«Ο καθηγιασμένος γάμος, ο πειθαρχημένος, ο χωρίς διαστροφήν, διατηρεί τον άνθρωπον φυσικώς και ηθικώς, ενώ πάσα άλλη μορφή σαρκικής απολαύσεως, έστω και υπό ονειρώδη μόνον μορφήν, διαφθείρει ολόκληρον τον άνθρωπον ήτοι την ψυχήν και το σώμα»
«Όσο μεγαλύτερη η αγάπη τόσο μεγαλύτερη η οδύνη της ψυχής. Όσο πληρέστερη η αγάπη τόσο πληρέστερη η γνώση. Όσο πιο φλογερή η αγάπη τόσο πιο πύρινη η προσευχή. Όσο τελειότερη η αγάπη, τόσο αγιότερος ο βίος»
«Η Χριστιανική διακονία συνεπάγεται ευσπλαχνία αγάπης. Είναι αναγκαίο ή να δεχθούμε μέσα στην καρδιά μας τις δυσκολίες και τη θλίψη αυτών που προσέρχονται σε εμάς ή αλλιώς να εισέλθουμε εμείς στην καρδιά, στα βάσανά τους, να ταυτισθούμε μαζί τους.»
***
«Κατά την διάρκεια της προσευχής υπέρ των ανθρώπων η καρδιά αισθάνεται μερικές φορές την πνευματική ή την ψυχική κατάσταση εκείνων για τους οποίους απευθύνει στο Θεό την προσευχή.
Αγαπητοί μου αδελφοί και αδελφές, ανοίξτε την καρδιά σας, για να χαράξει εκεί το Αγιο Πνεύμα την εικόνα του Χριστού. Τότε θα γίνετε σιγά-σιγά ικανοί να έχετε μέσα σας τη χαρά και το πένθος, το θάνατο και την ανάσταση.
Κοιτάξτε το μεγαλειώδες θέαμα που ο Θεός μας φανέρωσε στη δημιουργία του κόσμου, στην κατασκευή του ανθρώπου «κατ' εικόνα και καθ' ομοίωσιν» Του. Εκείνο που αναζητούμε δεν περιορίζεται στη μικρή μας καθημερινή ζωή. Αναζητούμε να είμαστε με τον Θεό και να αποκτήσουμε μέσα μας τη ζωή σε όλο το πλάτος, το κοσμικό και το θείο.
Για την Ορθόδοξη Εκκλησία η σωτηρία του ανθρώπου είναι η θέωσή του.
Μην έχετε υπερβολική εμπιστοσύνη στην ανώτερη μόρφωση που αποκτήσατε στον κόσμο. Ο πολιτισμός στον οποίο ζούμε είναι κουλτούρα της πτώσεως.
Τι σημαίνει σωτηρία; Ο θάνατος του σώματος είναι άραγε η προϋπόθεση για την είσοδο στη Βασιλεία του Χριστού; Πως μπορούμε να αναπτύξουμε την ικανότητά μας να ζούμε σύμφωνα με τις εντολές του Χριστού, σύμφωνα με το Αγιο Πνεύμα; Ενα μόνο έχει σημασία: να φυλάξουμε την ένταση της προσευχής και της μετάνοιας. Τότε ο θάνατος δε θα είναι ρήξη, αλλά μετάβαση στη Βασιλεία, για την οποία θα έχουμε ετοιμασθεί με την κοινωνία του Σώματος και του Αίματος του Χριστού, με την προσευχή και την επίκληση του Ονόματός Του: «Κύριε, Ιησού Χριστέ, ο θεός ημών, ελέησον ημάς και τον κόσμον Σου».
***
«Η απελπισία είναι η απώλεια της συνειδήσεως ότι ο θεός θέλει να μας δώσει την αιώνεια ζωή. Ο κόσμος ζει στην απελπισία. Οι άνθρωποι έχουν καταδικάσει οι ίδιοι τον εαυτό τους στο θάνατο. Πρέπει να παλέψουμε σώμα προς σώμα με την ακηδία.»
«Καταξίωσον, Κύριε, εν τη ημέρα ταύτη αναμαρτήτους φυλαχθήναι ημάς». Πολλές φορές επανέλαβα αυτή την προσευχή της Εκκλησίας. Η επί γης αναμάρτητη ζωή μας ανοίγει τις πύλες του Ουρανού. Δεν είναι ο πλούτος των γνώσεων που σώζει τον άνθρωπο. Είναι η αναμάρτητη ζωή που μας προετοιμάζει για τη ζωή με τον Θεό στο μέλλοντα αιώνα. Η χάρη του Αγίου Πνεύματος μας διδάσκει τις αιώνειες αλήθειες κατά το μέτρο που ζούμε σύμφωνα με τις εντολές: «Αγαπήσεις τον Θεό σου, τον Δημιουργό σου, με όλο το είναι σου και αγαπήσεις τον πλησίον σου ως σεαυτόν». Ναί, κρατείτε πάντοτε αυτές τις εντολές.
«Ποια στάση να κρατάμε στην εκκλησία; Πρέπει να στεκόμαστε με ένταση και αυτοσυγκέντρωση. Να έχουμε ένταση, δηλαδή μεγάλη προσοχή, ώστε να μην διαχέεται ο νους μας με επιφανειακά πράγματα και αλλότριες σκέψεις.»
«Οι πιστεύοντες εις τον Χριστόν διά πίστεως ελευθέρας πάσης αμφιβολίας ως Θεόν δημιουργόν και Θεόν σωτήρα ημών, εν παραφορά μετανοίας, λαμβάνουν πείραν και του Αδου και της Αναστάσεως, πρίν ή γευθούν του σωματικού θανάτου».
Γέροντας Σωφρόνιος Σαχάρωφ
According to the teachings of the Church, the particular
judgment of souls by God is preceded by their torments, or
rather a series of tests; these take place in the regions of
the air, where the evil spirits have their domain (Eph. 6.
12). They detain the souls and declare and make manifest all
the sins which these souls perpetrated during their lives.
We know about these torments in great detail because they
were revealed to Gregory, the disciple of the holy monk St.
Basil the New, who lived in the first half of the Tenth
century. Gregory in his vision learned about the hour of
death and the passing through torments of a woman known as
the Blessed Theodora.
When Gregory asked her to tell him about her passing away
and about the circumstances that attended her death and
followed it, she told him in great detail the following. "My
child Gregory," she said, "you have asked me about a
terrible thing, which it is frightening even to recollect.
"When the hour of my death came, I saw faces such as I had
never seen before, and heard words such as I had never
heard. What shall I say? Cruel and hard to endure evils, of
which I formerly had no idea, encountered me then because of
my evil deeds. However, through the prayers and the
assistance of our common spiritual father Basil I was saved
from these hardships. But how shall I tell you about that
physical pain, that stress and close feeling which the dying
experience? Like a man who, entirely naked, falls into a
great fire, burns, melts, and turns into ashes; so the dying
are destroyed by their deathly illness in the bitter hour
when the soul parts from the body.
"When I drew near the end of my life and the time of my
departure hence had come, I saw a great multitude of
Ethiopians who had surrounded my couch. Their faces were
dark like soot and pitch, their eyes were like glowing
coals, their entire appearance was as frightening and evil
as the fiery hell itself. They began to grow indignant and
to make noise like dogs; others howled like wolves. As they
looked at me, they were full of anger; they threatened me,
kept rushing at me and gnashing their teeth, and appeared
ready to devour me. Yet they seemed to wait for a judge who
had not yet come but would do so: they were making ready
charts and unrolling scrolls on which were written all my
evil deeds. My miserable soul was taken by great fear and
trembling. Not only the bitterness of death tormented me but
even more the terrible appearance and the cruel demeanor of
the frightening Ethiopians; these were to me like another
death, only a worse one. I kept turning away my eyes in all
directions so as not to see their terrible faces, and wished
not to hear their voices, but I was unable to be rid of
them. They turned everywhere and there was no one to help
me.
"When I was at the end of my strength I saw two radiant
angels of God, who were like youths of inexpressible beauty.
They were coming toward me. Their faces were shining, their
gaze was full of love; their hair was like snow, white with
a golden tinge; their garments glistened like lightning and
were girded with gold. When they came near me, they stopped
on the right side of my couch and entered into a quiet
conversation between themselves. As I saw them I was filled
with joy and looked at them with pleasure.
"The black Ethiopians shuddered and retreated some
distance. One of the radiant youths, angrily addressing the
black ones, said: 'O shameless, cursed, dark, and evil
enemies of the human race! Why do you always come first to
the dying and frighten and confuse every parting soul by
your words? You have no reason to rejoice, for here you will
find nothing. God is merciful to this soul, and you have no
part and no allotment in her.' When the angel ceased
speaking, the Ethiopians tottered, began to cry out, and
mutter, and point to all my evil deeds, committed from my
youth on. They exclaimed: 'We have no part in her, you say!
Whose sins then are these? Did she not do such and such?'
With such exclamations they kept their position and were
waiting for death. When death came, it was roaring like a
lion and was very frightening in appearance. It looked like
a human being but had no body; instead it consisted of human
bones. Death brought various instruments of torture, such as
swords, arrows, javelins, sickles, saws, and others unknown
to me. When I saw these, my humble soul trembled with fear.
The holy angels said to death: 'Do not tarry, free this soul
from its bodily ties, and do it fast and quietly, for she
has but a small burden of sins.' Death stepped up to me,
took a small axe and separated my legs, then my arms; then
with its other instruments it weakened all the rest of my
limbs, separating them joint by joint. I lost the use of my
arms and legs, my whole body grew numb, and I no longer was
able to move. Finally death cut off my head, and I no longer
could move it, for it felt as if it belonged to someone
else. Lastly, death dissolved in a cup some kind of mixture,
and putting the cup to my lips, made me drink. The potion
was so bitter that my soul was unable to endure it. It
shuddered and went out of my body.
"The light-bearing angels immediately took it in their
arms. When I looked back I saw my body lying breathless and
immovable. I looked at my body like someone who has taken
off his clothes and thrown them down; this was a strange
feeling. Meanwhile, although the holy angels were holding
me, the demons, in their Ethiopian guise, surrounded us and
cried: 'This soul has a multitude of sins—let her answer for
them!' They kept pointing to my sins, but the holy angels
sought out my good deeds; and indeed, with God's help they
found all that, by God's grace, I ever did of good. The
angels gathered together everything that was good: all those
instances when I gave alms to the needy, or fed the hungry,
or gave the thirsty to drink, or clothed the naked, or
brought into my house and rested there the homeless, or
served the servants of God, or visited the sick, and
comforted them or those who were imprisoned; and also when I
went with diligence to God's house and prayed with all my
heart and shed tears, or when I attentively listened to what
was read and sung in church, or brought to church incense
and candles, or filled with oil the church lamps before the
icons, or kissed the icons with awe and reverence; or when I
fasted and abstained on Wednesdays, Fridays, or during other
fasts, or when I prostrated myself before God and spent
nights awake in prayer, or when I sighed to God and wept for
my sins, or confessed my sins before my spiritual father
with great regret for what I had done, and then tried with
all my strength to balance my sins with good deeds; or when
I did anything good to my neighbors, when I bore no anger to
my enemies, bore no grudges and meekly endured hurts and
reproaches, did good in return for evil, humbled myself,
felt sorry for those who suffered and commiserated with
those to whom anything bad happened, comforted those who
were weeping and rendered them assistance, supported any
good beginning and tried to turn people away from what was
bad; or myself turned my eyes away from vanity and kept my
tongue from oaths, lies, or bearing false witness, or
speaking without need—and all my other good deeds, even the
least important ones, did the holy angels gather and make
ready to put on the scale in order to balance my evil deeds.
"The Ethiopians, however, saw this and gnashed their teeth
at me. They wanted to tear me instantly from the angels'
arms and to carry me down to the bottom of hell. At this
time holy Basil himself appeared unexpectedly and said to
the holy angels. 'Holy angels! This soul did great service
to ease my old age, and therefore I prayed for her to God,
and God has given her to me.' Having said this, he took
something out that appeared like a little bag of gold and
gave it to the angels with the words: 'Here is the treasure
of prayers before the Lord for this soul! As you pass
through the torments of the air and the evil spirits begin
to torment her, pay her debts with this.'
"He then disappeared, but the evil spirits, when they saw
the gift of holy Basil, at first stood dumbfounded. Then
they raised plaintive cries and became invisible. Then
Basil, the man who had pleased God, came again. He bore many
vessels of pure oil and precious myrrh, and all these, one
after the other, he poured on me. I was filled with
spiritual fragrance and felt that I had changed and become
very light. Once more the holy man said to the angels:
'When, holy angels, you will have done for this soul all
that is needed, lead her to the dwelling that the Lord has
prepared for me, and let her remain there.' Then he once
more became invisible. The holy angels took me up, and we
went eastward through the air.
The First Torment. "As we were rising from the earth to the
heights of heaven, we were first met by the spirits of the
first torment. Here the souls are tormented for the sins of
idle speech; this is, for speaking without thinking, or
speaking what is vile and shameless, or speaking without
need or order. We stopped, and many scrolls were brought out
on which there were recorded all the words that I had
uttered from my youth on, either needlessly or unreasonably;
and especially when such words expressed anything unclean or
blasphemous, as young people frequently bear on their
tongue.
"There I saw recorded all my angry words, foul words,
worldly shameless songs, wild cries and laughter. The evil
spirits accused me of all this and indicated the time and
place, when and where and in whose company, I spoke these
vain words or evoked the wrath of God by my unseemly words,
even though at the time I did not consider such things
sinful; and paying no great attention to them did not
confess them to my spiritual father, and never repented. Now
I kept silent, as if I had lost my voice. I was unable to
reply because the evil spirits accused me rightly. But while
I was silent in my shame and trembled with fear, the holy
angels offered some of my good deeds and, since these were
not enough, they added something from the treasure given me
by the holy man Basil; and thus they paid my debts at this
station.
Second Torment. "Thence we ascended and drew near the
torment of lying. Here is tested every lying word: failure
to keep oaths, vain use of God's name, failure to keep vows
given to God, insincere or false confession of sins, and the
like. The spirits of this station are evil and ruthless.
They stopped us and began to question us closely. However, I
was accused of two things only: first, that I occasionally
lied in matters of small importance—something that I did not
even consider sinful; second, that, because of a false sense
of shame, I sometimes insincerely confessed my sins to my
spiritual father. As for false oaths or false witness, none
of these, through Christ's grace, was found in me. Here the
holy angels put down for my sins some of my good deeds, but
the prayers of my spiritual father did even more to save me.
We went on.
Third Torment. "We reached the station where souls answer
for speaking evil of others and spreading rumors about them.
When we were stopped here, I understood how heavy is the sin
of speaking evil about one's neighbor, and how great an evil
it is to spread bad rumors, judge the deeds of others,
damage someone's reputation, slander, give bad words to
people, or laugh at other's deficiencies. Such sinners are
regarded as Antichrists, since even before Christ has judged
their neighbors they already allow themselves this right of
judgment. In me, however, through the grace of Christ, they
did not find much of these sins, for all the days of my life
I always diligently strove not to condemn anyone, never to
spread falsehoods about people, never to laugh at anyone,
and never to give anyone bad words. Only occasionally, when
I heard how other people condemn, malign, or laugh, did I
too happen to agree with them to some extent in thought, or
even, in my carelessness, add my word to what they were
saying; but even then I instantly caught myself and stopped.
But here I was held responsible even for the inclination.
Here also the angels freed me by means of the prayers of the
holy man Basil, and we continued to ascend.
Fourth Torment. "We reached the station where gluttony is
punished, and evil spirits immediately rushed out to meet
us, for they hoped to find a victim. Their faces resembled
those of sensuous gluttons and despicable drunkards. They
walked around us like dogs and immediately showed their
count of all the instances when I ate secretly from others,
or without need, or when I ate in the morning before I had
even prayed and put on myself the sign of the cross; or
when, during the holy fasts, I ate before the church service
was over. They also revealed all the instances when I was
drunk and even showed us those very cups, goblets, and
others vessels from which I became intoxicated at such and
such a time, during such and such a feast, with such and
such companions. And every other instance of my gluttony was
pointed out to me, and the demons already rejoiced, as if
they had put their hands on me. I was trembling at the sight
of such accusations and did not know how to object. But the
holy angels took out enough from what was given to us by the
holy man Basil, balanced my sins with this and set me free.'
When the spirits saw the ransom, they cried out: 'woe! our
labors and hopes have perished!' and threw their records of
my gluttony into the air. I, however, rejoiced, and we went
on.
"As we were ascending, the holy angels talked among
themselves and said words to this effect: 'Truly does this
soul have great help from Basil, a man who has pleased God.
If it had not been for his prayers, she would have suffered
a great deal in those stations of the air.' I took courage
and said to them: 'It seems, holy angels, that none of the
earth dwellers knows what happens here and what the soul can
expect after death.' 'But the angels replied: 'Does not the
Divine Scripture testify concerning all of this? It is read
in churches and preached by priests. Only those people who
are passionately devoted to the vanities of earth take no
heed of what they are told, and since they consider daily
gluttony and drunkenness to be the greatest pleasure, they
eat beyond measure and drink without thinking of the fear of
God. Their belly is their God. They have no thought of
future life and do not remember what is said in the
Scripture: "Woe unto you that are full! for ye shall hunger"
(Luke 6. 25).
"'Still, even the gluttonous can be saved. Those of them
that are merciful and kindhearted to needy and beggars and
help those who ask for help—such men can easily obtain from
God forgiveness of their sins, and because of their
kindheartedness toward their neighbors, pass the stations of
torment without stopping. It is said in the Scripture: alms
save from death and cleanse every kind of sin; those who
give alms and do justice will be filled with life (Tob. 12.
9). But he who does not strive to cleanse his sins by good
deeds cannot escape the dark tormentors who lead the sinners
down to hell and hold them bound until the terrible judgment
at Christ's Second Coming. You too would not have escaped
here your evil lot, were it not that you have received the
treasure of holy Basil's prayers.'
Fifth Torment. "During this conversation we reached the
station of sloth, where sinners are accused of all those
days and hours which they spent in idleness. Here too are
detained those who did not work themselves but lived by the
labor of others; and those who were hired to work, took
their wages, but did not fulfill the duties which they had
taken upon themselves. And also are stopped here those who
do not care to praise God and are too lazy to go to church
on holidays and Sundays, either in the morning or to the
Divine Liturgy, or to other church services. And here too
people are accused of despondency and general carelessness
about things that have to do with the salvation of their
souls; and this happens to both laymen and those who are
ordained. Many are thence led into the abyss. I too was
accused there of much and could not have freed myself if the
holy angels had not balanced my deficiencies by the gifts of
the holy man Basil.
Sixth Torment. "Thence we came to the torment of stealing,
and although we were briefly stopped there, we went on after
we had given a small ransom only: for no stealing was found
on my record, except some very unimportant occurrences in my
childhood, and those stemmed from lack of reason.
Seventh Torment. "We passed without stopping through the
station of avarice and love of money. By God's grace I never
loved riches. I was content with what God gave me and never
was avaricious; on the contrary, I diligently gave to the
needy that which I had.
Eighth Torment. "When we rose still higher, we came to the
station of usury, where those are accused who lend money for
illegal interest; and here too are stopped those who gain
riches by exploiting their neighbors; and those who take
bribes, or by some other way stealing indirectly, acquire
what really belongs to others. The tormentors, when they did
not find me guilty of such sins, gnashed their teeth with
annoyance, but we went on, praising God in the meanwhile.
Ninth Torment. "Now there lay before us the torment of
injustice. Here are punished the unjust judges who acquit
the guilty and condemn the innocent, all for the sake of
gain; and also those who do not give the appointed wages to
those whom they have hired, and the merchants who use false
weights and measures; and all the others who are in some way
or other unjust. We, however, by God's grace, passed this
station without incurring any grief after we had given only
a little bit for my sins in this regard.
Tenth Torment. "As for the torment of envy, we passed it
without giving anything at all in payment, for I never had
been envious. Here also people have to face the accusations
of lack of love, hatred toward their brethren,
unfriendliness, and other manifestations of hatred. Through
the mercy of Christ our God, I was found innocent of all
these sins; and although I saw the savagery of the demons, I
no longer was afraid of them. Joyfully we went on.
Eleventh Torment. "We passed then the station of pride,
where arrogant spirits make accusations of vanity, absolute
reliance on oneself rather than on God, disdain of others,
and bragging; and here too the souls are tormented for their
failure to give proper honor to their parents, their
government, or their other superiors appointed by God, and
for failure to obey them. Here we put down very little for
my sins, and I was free.
Twelfth Torment. "As we continued rising toward heaven, we
encountered the torment of anger and ruthlessness. Happy is
the man who never in his life felt anger. The eldest of the
evil spirits was sitting here on a throne, and he was full
of anger, ruthlessness, and pride. Ruthlessly and angrily he
ordered his servants to torment and accuse me. They licked
their chaps like dogs and began to point out not only all
those occasions when I actually said something angry or
unfeeling to anyone, or harmed anyone by my words, but even
those instances when I merely looked angrily at my children
or punished them severely. All these cases they represented
vividly and even indicated the time when everything
happened, the persons on whom I poured out my anger, the
very words which I then used, and in whose presence I used
them. The angels replied to all this by offering part of the
treasure, and we went on.
Thirteenth Torment. "After this the torment of bearing
grudges lay before us. Here merciless accusations await
those who nurture in their hearts evil thoughts against
their neighbors and return evil for evil. God's mercy saved
me here too, for I did not tend to have such wicked designs
and did not use to keep in mind offences of others toward
me; on the contrary, whenever I could I displayed love and
meekness toward those who offended me, and thus overcame
their evil by my goodness. Here we paid nothing. Joyful in
the Lord, we went on.
"Here I dared to ask my angel leaders: 'Tell me how can
these terrible rulers of the air know in such detail all the
evil deeds of men, and not only the open ones but even those
that are secret?' The angels replied: 'Every Christian, as
soon as he is baptized, receives from God an appointed
guardian angel who guards him invisibly and inspires him
night and day to every kind of good deed; he also records
all his good deeds, for which that man later can hope to
receive from the Lord grace and eternal recompense in the
Heavenly Kingdom. The prince of darkness, who desires to
draw into his own destruction the whole race of men as well,
also appoints one of his evil spirits to walk in the man's
steps and record all his evil deeds. It is his duty to
inspire man to such deeds by any vile trickery in his power;
and when he succeeds in his designs, he records all the
wickedness of which the man has made himself guilty. Such an
evil spirit spreads the report of every man's sins to all
the stations of torment, and this is how the sins become
known to the princes of the air. When the soul parts from
its body and desires to go to its Creator in heaven, the
evil spirits prevent the soul and show to it its sins. If
the soul has done more good deeds than evil, they cannot
keep it; but if the sins outweigh the good deeds, they keep
the soul for some time, shut it up in the prison where it
cannot know God, and torment it as much as God's power
allows them, until that soul, by means of prayers of the
Church and good deeds done for its sake by those who are
still on earth, should be granted forgiveness.
"Those who believe in the Holy Trinity and take as
frequently as possible the Holy Communion of the Holy
Mysteries of Christ our Saviour's Body and Blood—such people
can rise to heaven directly, with no hindrances, and the
holy angels defend them, and the holy saints of God pray for
their salvation, since they have lived righteously. No one,
however, takes care of the wicked and depraved heretics, who
do nothing useful during their lives, and live in disbelief
and heresy. The angels can say nothing in their defence.
"When a soul proves to be so sinful and impure before God
that it has no hope of salvation, the evil spirits
immediately bring it down into the abyss, where their own
place of eternal torment is also. There the lost souls are
kept until the time of the Lord's Second Coming. Then they
will unite with their bodies and will incur torment in the
fiery hell together with the devils. 'Note also,' said the
angels, 'that this is the way by which only those who are
enlightened by the faith and by holy baptism can rise and be
tested in the stations of torment. The unbelievers do not
come here. Their souls belong to hell even before they part
from their bodies. When they die the devils take their souls
with no need to test them. Such souls are their proper prey,
and they take them down to the abyss.'
Fourteenth Torment. "During our conversation we reached the
torment of murder, where are accused not only men such as
robbers, but even those who have in some way wounded another
man, or given him a blow, or pushed him angrily, or shoved
him. We gave a little and went on.
Fifteenth Torment. "We passed the torment of magic,
sorcery, poisoning, and incantations. The spirits of this
station resemble serpents, snakes, and toads. They are
frightening and repulsive. By the grace of God they found
nothing of the kind in me, and we went on, accompanied by
the shouts of the demons: 'Soon you will come to the torment
of fornication; let us see how you will free yourself from
it!'
"As we were rising, I dared to question the holy angels
once more: 'Do all Christians pass these torments? Is there
no possibility to pass by the torments and not be tested in
any of the stations?' The angels replied: 'There is no other
way for the souls that rise toward heaven. Every one goes
this way, but not everyone is tormented like you; only
sinners like you incur the torments, for they have not
confessed their sins fully, and moved by a false sense of
shame, have kept their really shameful deeds secret from
their spiritual fathers. When a man wholeheartedly confesses
his evil deeds and repents and regrets them, his sins are
invisibly wiped out by God's mercy. When a repentant soul
comes here, the tormentors of the air open their books but
find nothing written there; the soul, however, joyfully
ascends to the throne of God.
"'The evil spirits open their records but find nothing
written there, for the Holy Spirit has made invisible all
the writing. The spirits see this and know that what they
have recorded has all been obliterated because of the soul's
confession, and they are very much saddened by this. If the
man is still alive when his confession has wiped out his
sins, the spirits once again try to have an occasion to
record some new sins of his.
"'Indeed, there is a great source of salvation for man in
his confession! Confession saves him from many misfortunes
and much unhappiness and gives him the opportunity to pass
all the torments with no hindrance and to approach God. Some
people do not confess their sins because they hope to have
time for salvation and for a remittance of their sins;
others are simply ashamed of telling their spiritual father
about their sins. They will, however, be severely tested
when they pass the stations of torment. There are still
other people, who are ashamed of telling everything to one
spiritual father. Therefore they choose several and reveal
some of their sins to one and others to another, and so on;
they will be punished for this kind of confession and will
suffer a great deal as they pass from one torment into
another.
"'If you too had made a complete confession of your sins
and had been granted remission of them, and had then done
all you could to make up for them by good deeds—if you had
done all this, you would not have been subjected to such
terrible torments in the stations. You were, however,
greatly helped by the fact that you have long ago ceased to
commit deadly sins and have spent the rest of your life in
virtue; and especially have you been helped by the prayers
of God's holy man Basil, whom you have served much and
diligently.'
Sixteenth Torment. "During our conversation we approached
the torment of fornication, where souls are accused not of
actual fornication only but also of amorous daydreaming, of
finding such thoughts sweet, of impure glances, lustful
touches and passionate strokings. The prince of this torment
was clothed in a dirty and stenching garment befouled by a
bloody foam, and there was a multitude of demons standing
around him. When they saw me they marveled that I had
already 'Passed so many torments. They brought out the
records of all my deeds of fornication and accused me by
pointing out the persons, the places, and the times: with
whom, when, and where I sinned in my youth. I kept silent
and was trembling with shame and fear. The holy angels,
however, said to the devils: 'Long ago has she left her
deeds of fornication and has spent the remainder of her life
in purity, abstinence, and fasting.' But the demons replied:
'We too know that she has long ago ceased sinning, but she
has not sincerely confessed to her spiritual father and has
not received from him proper directions for the satisfaction
which she should do for her sins. Therefore she is ours!
Either leave her to us or ransom her with good deeds.' The
angels put down many of my good deeds but even more did they
take from the gift given us by the holy man Basil; barely
did I save myself from great grief.
Seventeenth Torment. "We reached the torment of adultery,
where are accused of their sins those who are married but do
not observe marital fidelity toward each other and do not
keep their marriage bed undefiled; and here too rapes are
punished. Besides, here are strictly punished those who have
devoted themselves to God and promised to live for Christ
alone, but have fallen and failed to keep their purity. I
too had a great debt here; the evil spirits already had
accused me and were about to tear me from the arms of the
angels, but the angels began to argue with them and show
them all my later labors and good deeds. After some time
they rescued me, but with difficulty, and not so much by my
good deeds, all of which, down to the last, they deposited
here—but rather by the treasure of my father Basil, from
which they also took very much to put on the scale to
balance my iniquities. Then they took me and we went on.
Eighteenth Torment. "We approached the station of the
Sodomic sins; here souls are Accused of all unnatural sins,
incests, and others revolting deeds performed in secret,
shameful and frightening even to think about. The prince of
this torment was more disgusting than any other devil; he
was befouled by pus and full of stench. His servants were
similar to him. The stench that came from them was not to be
endured, their ugliness was unimaginable, their cruelty and
ruthlessness not to be expressed. They surrounded us but by
the grace of God found nothing in me and ran away from us in
their shame. We, however, went on.
"The holy angels said to me: 'You have seen, Theodora, the
frightening and disgusting torments of fornication! Know
then that few are the souls that pass them without stopping
and paying their ransom; for the whole world lies immersed
in the evils of seductive foulness, and all mankind is
sensuous. Few guard against the impurities of fornication
and deaden the desire of their own flesh. And this is the
reason why few pass here freely; many come as far as this
place but perish here. The rulers of the torments of
fornication boast that they more than any of the others fill
the fiery abyss of hell with the souls of men. But you,
Theodora, must thank God that you have already passed the
torments of fornication by the prayers of the holy man
Basil, your father. Now you will no longer fear.'
Nineteenth Torment. "Thereafter we came to the torment of
heresies, where are punished those reasonings about faith
which are not right, and also turning away from the Orthodox
confession of faith, and lack of faith, doubts about it,
denial of holy things or a negative attitude toward them,
and other sins of the kind. I passed this torment without
being tested; we were no longer far from the gates of
Heaven.
Twentieth Torment. "But here we were met by the evil
spirits of the last torment, the station that tests lack of
compassion and cruelty of heart. Cruel are the tormentors of
this place, and their prince is terrible, and dried-up and
depressed is his appearance. Here the souls of the
unmerciful are tormented without mercy. Even if a man
performs the most outstanding deeds, mortifies himself by
fasting, prays ceaselessly, and guards and keeps the purity
of his body, but is merciless from this station he is cast
down into the abyss of hell and will receive no mercy in all
eternity. We, however, by the grace of Christ, passed this
place without trouble, for we were helped by the prayers of
the holy man Basil.
"Now we approached the gates of Heaven. We entered
joyfully, for we had passed unharmed through the bitter
tests of the torments. The gates resembled crystal, and the
buildings that stood there glistened like stars. The youths
who stood there were wearing golden garments. They joyfully
received us, for they saw that a soul had escaped from the
bitter tests of the torments of the air.
"As we were walking in heaven, joyful and glad to be saved,
the water that was above the earth parted, and, then it
closed again behind us. We came to a very awesome place
where there were very beautiful youths in fiery garments.
They saw the angels carrying me and met us with joy at the
salvation of my soul for the kingdom of God. They went
together with us and sang the Divine Song.
"As we continued walking, a cloud descended on us, and then
another cloud; and when we had gone somewhat farther, we saw
an inexplicable height on which was the throne of God; it
was very white and enlightened all who stood before it.
Around it stood very beautiful youths clothed in red and
shining. Why should I, my child Gregory, tell you about it?
There are things that cannot be either understood or
explained. Reason is clouded by incapacity to understand
fully, and memory vanishes there; I forgot where I was.
"The holy angels who had brought me there led me to the
throne of God, and here I bowed before the Unseen God; and
then I heard a voice which said: 'Go with her and show her
all the souls of the blessed and of the sinners, all the
dwellings of the saints that are in Paradise, and the
dwellings in the nether regions of hell; then grant her rest
wherever my follower Basil will indicate.'
"We went on a road unknown to me and came to the dwellings
of the saints. What shall I say about them? I am in
confusion. There are various chambers arranged artfully and
beautifully. Of course they are created by God's hand and
are what the Scripture calls 'the cool place, the fruitful
place, the place of rest.'
"When I saw all this I marveled and was very joyous and
happily looked at everything. A holy angel who was showing
these things to me explained: 'This is the abode of the
Apostles; that one—of the prophets and other martyrs; those
others of the holy bishops, holy monks, and the holy
righteous.' All these were in their breadth and length like
a king's city.
"When we entered and found ourselves inside these lovely
dwellings, the saints met us and kissed us in spirit and
rejoiced in my salvation. Then they took me to the abode of
the patriarch Abraham and showed me everything that was
there. Everything was full of glory and of spiritual joy; of
fragrant flowers, myrrh, and sweet odors.
"There were various chambers, which are made and upheld by
God's Spirit alone. We saw there a multitude of infants who
were happy and rejoicing. I asked my angel leaders: 'Who are
these infants gathered here, bathed in light, rejoicing
around this holy old man?' The angels replied that this was
the patriarch Abraham, and that the multitude was composed
of Christian infants.
"Then we went to see the surroundings of Paradise; but
their beauty simply cannot be described. If I should begin
to tell all that I saw and heard there, I should be filled
with fear and trembling.
"Then I was led into the nether reaches of hell, where the
Lord has bound and imprisoned Satan. There I saw frightening
torments. Thence they led me westward, and there too I saw
similar horrible torments, ready for sinners. As the angels
showed all this to me, they said: 'Do you see from what
misfortunes you have been saved by the prayers of the holy
man?'
"The sinners in their horrible torments were shrieking and
begging for mercy. I saw torments of such a kind that it is
excruciating even to tell about them.
"When we had passed and examined all this, one of the
angels who, accompanied me said: 'You know, Theodora, that
in the world there is the custom to remember the dead on the
fortieth day after their death; today the holy man Basil
remembers you on earth in his prayers.'
"Yes, my spiritual child Gregory, forty days have now
passed since the time when my soul parted from my body, and
I am in the place which is ready also for our holy father
Basil. You are still in the world, and so is holy Basil, but
he shows the way of truth to all who come to him, and by
compelling them to repent he makes many turn to the Lord.
"Come with me. We shall enter my inner chamber and you will
look at it. Not long before you came, the holy man Basil was
also here."
I went after her and we entered together. As we were
walking along I saw that her garments were as white as snow.
We entered a palace decorated with gold. In its midst there
were various trees that bore splendid fruit. When I looked
east I saw luxurious halls, light and high. There was a
large table on which stood golden vessels; they looked very
expensive and were wondrous to look at. In the vessels were
vegetables of all sorts, and fragrance issued from them.
The holy man Basil was there, sitting on a marvelous
throne. Near the table there stood people, but they were
unlike those who live on earth and have bodies: they were
surrounded as if by the rays of the sun, but they still
looked human.
As they ate the food that was on the table, the amount of
the food became replenished of itself. Beautiful youths were
serving them. When any of those who were at the table wished
to drink, he poured a liquid into his mouth and experienced
a spiritual sweetness. They spent long hours at this table.
The youths who were serving them were girded with golden
belts, and on their heads were crowns made from a precious
stone.
Theodora approached the holy man and begged him for me. The
holy man looked at me and joyfully called me to himself. I
approached and bowed before him to the ground, as was our
custom. He quietly told me: "God will be merciful to you and
forgive you, my child! He is the All-merciful; He will
reward you with all the heavenly goods." He lifted me from
the ground and continued: "Here is Theodora. You very much
wished to see her and asked me for this so intently: now you
do see her, and you see where she is and of what destiny her
soul has been found worthy in this our life beyond death.
Look at her well."
Theodora looked at me and said: "My brother Gregory!
Because you thought about me humbly, the merciful Lord has
fulfilled your wish through the prayer of our father, the
holy man Basil."
The holy man turned to Theodora and said: "Go with him and
show him my garden. Let him see its beauty." She took me by
my right hand and brought me to a wall in which there was a
golden gate. After she had opened the gate, she led me
inside the garden. There I saw trees of a marvelous beauty.
Their leaves were golden, they were full of flowers and
emitted an unusually pleasant fragrance.
There was a countless number of such lovely trees. Their
branches were bowed to the ground because of the weight of
the fruit. All this astonished me. Theodora turned toward me
and asked: "Why do you wonder? How much would you marvel if
you saw the garden called Paradise, which the Lord Himself
planted in the East!? You would be astonished at its
greatness and beauty. As compared to it, this garden is
nothing."
I begged Theodora to tell me who had planted this garden,
for I had never seen anything like it. She replied that it
was obvious that I never had, for I was still living on
earth; here, however, everything was other than earthly, and
the life led here was other than earthly.
"God grants such dwellings in the life beyond death, but
only to those who have led a life full of labors and sweat,
such as the life of our holy father Basil has been from his
youth to his deep old age. Such dwellings are granted to
those who pray zealously and deny their desires, as he has
done when he slept on bare ground, endured intense heat and
frost, ate on occasion nothing except grass. This is the
kind of life which he has led before he came to
Constantinople, but this life was a source of salvation to
himself, and through him, to many others. This kind of life,
and prayers of holy men like Basil, enable the departed to
enter the abodes of the blessed.
"He who during his earthly life endures many griefs and
misfortunes; he who strictly keeps the Lord's commandments
and does not swerve from them—he receives his reward and his
comfort in the life beyond death. The holy author of the
Psalms, David, said about the difficult life on earth that
pleases God: 'Eat of the fruit of your labors'."
When Theodora told me that life in heaven is different from
life on earth, I could not help touching myself, for I
seemed eager to know if I was still in the flesh; as of
course I was. My feelings and thoughts were pure, and my
spirit rejoiced in all that I had seen. I wished to return
to the palace by the same gate through which I had entered.
When, however, I had returned to the palace, I no longer
found anyone at the table.
I bowed to Theodora and returned home; and at that very
moment I awoke and thought to myself: where have I been and
what was all that which I have seen and heard?
I rose from my bed and went to the holy Basil in order to
learn from him whether my vision was from God or from the
devils. When I came to him, I, according to our custom,
bowed to the ground. He blessed me, bade me to sit near him
and asked me: "Do you know, my child, where you were this
night?"
I pretended to know nothing and replied: "My father, I have
been nowhere; I was sleeping on my bed." The holy man said:
"This is true. Your body actually was asleep on your bed,
but your spirit was elsewhere, and you still know everything
that was revealed to you this night.
"You have seen Theodora. When you approached the gates of
the heavenly kingdom, she met you joyfully, led you inside
the house, showed you everything, told you about her death
and about all the torments that she had passed.
"Was it not at my bidding that you went into the court
where you saw a marvelous table and its wondrous
arrangement? Did you not see the vegetables placed there,
and did you not recognize their sweetness and see the
flowers, and what the feasters drank, and what youths were
serving them?
"Did you not stand still and look at the beauty of those
halls? When I came, did I not tell you to look at Theodora,
since you had so much wished to see her and learn from her
how she had been rewarded for her saintly life?
"Did she then not lead you at my bidding within the sacred
enclosure? Did you not see all this in your vision this
night?
"How is it then that you are saying that you have seen
nothing?"
When I heard the saint saying all this, I no longer doubted
that this was no delusion, no dream, but an actual vision
sent to me by the Lord God.
I said to myself: how great must this holy man be before
God! He himself was there in both his body and his soul, and
now he knows all that I have seen and heard there! My eyes
filled with tears and I said: "It is true, my holy father;
everything was such as you have said. I thank the Lover of
Men, the Lord our God Jesus Christ, Who has granted it to me
to see all this and has put it in my thoughts to take
recourse to you, so that I can constantly be under the
protection of your prayers and can be filled with the
sweetness of my vision, in which such great marvels have
been revealed to me."
The saint said to me: "If, my child Gregory, you will
complete your earthly journey rightly and will not swerve
from the Divine commandments, the evil spirits of the
torments in the air will be unable after your death to harm
you; you have heard this from Theodora: you will pass the
stations of torment and will be blessed. Joyfully will you
be met where you have been this night and have seen
Theodora; and where 1, sinner that I am, also hope to be
admitted to the abode which you have seen; for I place my
hope upon Christ, Who has promised to give His grace to me.
"Listen, my child, to what I am saying to you, but keep the
secret of your father. I wish to die before you, and you
will follow me after a long time, when you will have
perfected yourself in good works. This has been revealed to
me by the Lord.
"Keep secret all that I have told you, while I am alive;
let no one find out anything of what you have heard.
"When I am dead, if you should wish to undertake the labor
and not to leave my humble life without remembrance,
describe it as it is customary to describe the lives of
those who have exerted themselves in virtue.
"Describe, that is, not so much my life as that divine
grace which has led and strengthened me throughout my entire
life, and give me the ability to perform not only good deeds
but even miracles.
"Represent all that you seen and heard, and let it benefit
those who will read or listen to your account. But be
careful to state, first of all, that the Lord, when He so
deigns, helps any man to do great wonders; and tell
everything about these wonders witnessed by you, so that
those who will learn about them from you may praise God, Who
is generous with what is good.
"Beware of the traps of the evil one at all times of day
and night until the Lord should call you." All this and many
other things did the holy man tell me. Then he prayed and
dismissed me. (Lives of the Saints for March
26th).
St. Theodora's Journey Through the Aerial Toll-Houses
According to the teachings of the Church, the particular
judgment of souls by God is preceded by their torments, or
rather a series of tests; these take place in the regions of
the air, where the evil spirits have their domain (Eph. 6.
12). They detain the souls and declare and make manifest all
the sins which these souls perpetrated during their lives.
We know about these torments in great detail because they
were revealed to Gregory, the disciple of the holy monk St.
Basil the New, who lived in the first half of the Tenth
century. Gregory in his vision learned about the hour of
death and the passing through torments of a woman known as
the Blessed Theodora.
When Gregory asked her to tell him about her passing away
and about the circumstances that attended her death and
followed it, she told him in great detail the following. "My
child Gregory," she said, "you have asked me about a
terrible thing, which it is frightening even to recollect.
"When the hour of my death came, I saw faces such as I had
never seen before, and heard words such as I had never
heard. What shall I say? Cruel and hard to endure evils, of
which I formerly had no idea, encountered me then because of
my evil deeds. However, through the prayers and the
assistance of our common spiritual father Basil I was saved
from these hardships. But how shall I tell you about that
physical pain, that stress and close feeling which the dying
experience? Like a man who, entirely naked, falls into a
great fire, burns, melts, and turns into ashes; so the dying
are destroyed by their deathly illness in the bitter hour
when the soul parts from the body.
"When I drew near the end of my life and the time of my
departure hence had come, I saw a great multitude of
Ethiopians who had surrounded my couch. Their faces were
dark like soot and pitch, their eyes were like glowing
coals, their entire appearance was as frightening and evil
as the fiery hell itself. They began to grow indignant and
to make noise like dogs; others howled like wolves. As they
looked at me, they were full of anger; they threatened me,
kept rushing at me and gnashing their teeth, and appeared
ready to devour me. Yet they seemed to wait for a judge who
had not yet come but would do so: they were making ready
charts and unrolling scrolls on which were written all my
evil deeds. My miserable soul was taken by great fear and
trembling. Not only the bitterness of death tormented me but
even more the terrible appearance and the cruel demeanor of
the frightening Ethiopians; these were to me like another
death, only a worse one. I kept turning away my eyes in all
directions so as not to see their terrible faces, and wished
not to hear their voices, but I was unable to be rid of
them. They turned everywhere and there was no one to help
me.
"When I was at the end of my strength I saw two radiant
angels of God, who were like youths of inexpressible beauty.
They were coming toward me. Their faces were shining, their
gaze was full of love; their hair was like snow, white with
a golden tinge; their garments glistened like lightning and
were girded with gold. When they came near me, they stopped
on the right side of my couch and entered into a quiet
conversation between themselves. As I saw them I was filled
with joy and looked at them with pleasure.
"The black Ethiopians shuddered and retreated some
distance. One of the radiant youths, angrily addressing the
black ones, said: 'O shameless, cursed, dark, and evil
enemies of the human race! Why do you always come first to
the dying and frighten and confuse every parting soul by
your words? You have no reason to rejoice, for here you will
find nothing. God is merciful to this soul, and you have no
part and no allotment in her.' When the angel ceased
speaking, the Ethiopians tottered, began to cry out, and
mutter, and point to all my evil deeds, committed from my
youth on. They exclaimed: 'We have no part in her, you say!
Whose sins then are these? Did she not do such and such?'
With such exclamations they kept their position and were
waiting for death. When death came, it was roaring like a
lion and was very frightening in appearance. It looked like
a human being but had no body; instead it consisted of human
bones. Death brought various instruments of torture, such as
swords, arrows, javelins, sickles, saws, and others unknown
to me. When I saw these, my humble soul trembled with fear.
The holy angels said to death: 'Do not tarry, free this soul
from its bodily ties, and do it fast and quietly, for she
has but a small burden of sins.' Death stepped up to me,
took a small axe and separated my legs, then my arms; then
with its other instruments it weakened all the rest of my
limbs, separating them joint by joint. I lost the use of my
arms and legs, my whole body grew numb, and I no longer was
able to move. Finally death cut off my head, and I no longer
could move it, for it felt as if it belonged to someone
else. Lastly, death dissolved in a cup some kind of mixture,
and putting the cup to my lips, made me drink. The potion
was so bitter that my soul was unable to endure it. It
shuddered and went out of my body.
"The light-bearing angels immediately took it in their
arms. When I looked back I saw my body lying breathless and
immovable. I looked at my body like someone who has taken
off his clothes and thrown them down; this was a strange
feeling. Meanwhile, although the holy angels were holding
me, the demons, in their Ethiopian guise, surrounded us and
cried: 'This soul has a multitude of sins—let her answer for
them!' They kept pointing to my sins, but the holy angels
sought out my good deeds; and indeed, with God's help they
found all that, by God's grace, I ever did of good. The
angels gathered together everything that was good: all those
instances when I gave alms to the needy, or fed the hungry,
or gave the thirsty to drink, or clothed the naked, or
brought into my house and rested there the homeless, or
served the servants of God, or visited the sick, and
comforted them or those who were imprisoned; and also when I
went with diligence to God's house and prayed with all my
heart and shed tears, or when I attentively listened to what
was read and sung in church, or brought to church incense
and candles, or filled with oil the church lamps before the
icons, or kissed the icons with awe and reverence; or when I
fasted and abstained on Wednesdays, Fridays, or during other
fasts, or when I prostrated myself before God and spent
nights awake in prayer, or when I sighed to God and wept for
my sins, or confessed my sins before my spiritual father
with great regret for what I had done, and then tried with
all my strength to balance my sins with good deeds; or when
I did anything good to my neighbors, when I bore no anger to
my enemies, bore no grudges and meekly endured hurts and
reproaches, did good in return for evil, humbled myself,
felt sorry for those who suffered and commiserated with
those to whom anything bad happened, comforted those who
were weeping and rendered them assistance, supported any
good beginning and tried to turn people away from what was
bad; or myself turned my eyes away from vanity and kept my
tongue from oaths, lies, or bearing false witness, or
speaking without need—and all my other good deeds, even the
least important ones, did the holy angels gather and make
ready to put on the scale in order to balance my evil deeds.
"The Ethiopians, however, saw this and gnashed their teeth
at me. They wanted to tear me instantly from the angels'
arms and to carry me down to the bottom of hell. At this
time holy Basil himself appeared unexpectedly and said to
the holy angels. 'Holy angels! This soul did great service
to ease my old age, and therefore I prayed for her to God,
and God has given her to me.' Having said this, he took
something out that appeared like a little bag of gold and
gave it to the angels with the words: 'Here is the treasure
of prayers before the Lord for this soul! As you pass
through the torments of the air and the evil spirits begin
to torment her, pay her debts with this.'
"He then disappeared, but the evil spirits, when they saw
the gift of holy Basil, at first stood dumbfounded. Then
they raised plaintive cries and became invisible. Then
Basil, the man who had pleased God, came again. He bore many
vessels of pure oil and precious myrrh, and all these, one
after the other, he poured on me. I was filled with
spiritual fragrance and felt that I had changed and become
very light. Once more the holy man said to the angels:
'When, holy angels, you will have done for this soul all
that is needed, lead her to the dwelling that the Lord has
prepared for me, and let her remain there.' Then he once
more became invisible. The holy angels took me up, and we
went eastward through the air.
The First Torment. "As we were rising from the earth to the
heights of heaven, we were first met by the spirits of the
first torment. Here the souls are tormented for the sins of
idle speech; this is, for speaking without thinking, or
speaking what is vile and shameless, or speaking without
need or order. We stopped, and many scrolls were brought out
on which there were recorded all the words that I had
uttered from my youth on, either needlessly or unreasonably;
and especially when such words expressed anything unclean or
blasphemous, as young people frequently bear on their
tongue.
"There I saw recorded all my angry words, foul words,
worldly shameless songs, wild cries and laughter. The evil
spirits accused me of all this and indicated the time and
place, when and where and in whose company, I spoke these
vain words or evoked the wrath of God by my unseemly words,
even though at the time I did not consider such things
sinful; and paying no great attention to them did not
confess them to my spiritual father, and never repented. Now
I kept silent, as if I had lost my voice. I was unable to
reply because the evil spirits accused me rightly. But while
I was silent in my shame and trembled with fear, the holy
angels offered some of my good deeds and, since these were
not enough, they added something from the treasure given me
by the holy man Basil; and thus they paid my debts at this
station.
Second Torment. "Thence we ascended and drew near the
torment of lying. Here is tested every lying word: failure
to keep oaths, vain use of God's name, failure to keep vows
given to God, insincere or false confession of sins, and the
like. The spirits of this station are evil and ruthless.
They stopped us and began to question us closely. However, I
was accused of two things only: first, that I occasionally
lied in matters of small importance—something that I did not
even consider sinful; second, that, because of a false sense
of shame, I sometimes insincerely confessed my sins to my
spiritual father. As for false oaths or false witness, none
of these, through Christ's grace, was found in me. Here the
holy angels put down for my sins some of my good deeds, but
the prayers of my spiritual father did even more to save me.
We went on.
Third Torment. "We reached the station where souls answer
for speaking evil of others and spreading rumors about them.
When we were stopped here, I understood how heavy is the sin
of speaking evil about one's neighbor, and how great an evil
it is to spread bad rumors, judge the deeds of others,
damage someone's reputation, slander, give bad words to
people, or laugh at other's deficiencies. Such sinners are
regarded as Antichrists, since even before Christ has judged
their neighbors they already allow themselves this right of
judgment. In me, however, through the grace of Christ, they
did not find much of these sins, for all the days of my life
I always diligently strove not to condemn anyone, never to
spread falsehoods about people, never to laugh at anyone,
and never to give anyone bad words. Only occasionally, when
I heard how other people condemn, malign, or laugh, did I
too happen to agree with them to some extent in thought, or
even, in my carelessness, add my word to what they were
saying; but even then I instantly caught myself and stopped.
But here I was held responsible even for the inclination.
Here also the angels freed me by means of the prayers of the
holy man Basil, and we continued to ascend.
Fourth Torment. "We reached the station where gluttony is
punished, and evil spirits immediately rushed out to meet
us, for they hoped to find a victim. Their faces resembled
those of sensuous gluttons and despicable drunkards. They
walked around us like dogs and immediately showed their
count of all the instances when I ate secretly from others,
or without need, or when I ate in the morning before I had
even prayed and put on myself the sign of the cross; or
when, during the holy fasts, I ate before the church service
was over. They also revealed all the instances when I was
drunk and even showed us those very cups, goblets, and
others vessels from which I became intoxicated at such and
such a time, during such and such a feast, with such and
such companions. And every other instance of my gluttony was
pointed out to me, and the demons already rejoiced, as if
they had put their hands on me. I was trembling at the sight
of such accusations and did not know how to object. But the
holy angels took out enough from what was given to us by the
holy man Basil, balanced my sins with this and set me free.'
When the spirits saw the ransom, they cried out: 'woe! our
labors and hopes have perished!' and threw their records of
my gluttony into the air. I, however, rejoiced, and we went
on.
"As we were ascending, the holy angels talked among
themselves and said words to this effect: 'Truly does this
soul have great help from Basil, a man who has pleased God.
If it had not been for his prayers, she would have suffered
a great deal in those stations of the air.' I took courage
and said to them: 'It seems, holy angels, that none of the
earth dwellers knows what happens here and what the soul can
expect after death.' 'But the angels replied: 'Does not the
Divine Scripture testify concerning all of this? It is read
in churches and preached by priests. Only those people who
are passionately devoted to the vanities of earth take no
heed of what they are told, and since they consider daily
gluttony and drunkenness to be the greatest pleasure, they
eat beyond measure and drink without thinking of the fear of
God. Their belly is their God. They have no thought of
future life and do not remember what is said in the
Scripture: "Woe unto you that are full! for ye shall hunger"
(Luke 6. 25).
"'Still, even the gluttonous can be saved. Those of them
that are merciful and kindhearted to needy and beggars and
help those who ask for help—such men can easily obtain from
God forgiveness of their sins, and because of their
kindheartedness toward their neighbors, pass the stations of
torment without stopping. It is said in the Scripture: alms
save from death and cleanse every kind of sin; those who
give alms and do justice will be filled with life (Tob. 12.
9). But he who does not strive to cleanse his sins by good
deeds cannot escape the dark tormentors who lead the sinners
down to hell and hold them bound until the terrible judgment
at Christ's Second Coming. You too would not have escaped
here your evil lot, were it not that you have received the
treasure of holy Basil's prayers.'
Fifth Torment. "During this conversation we reached the
station of sloth, where sinners are accused of all those
days and hours which they spent in idleness. Here too are
detained those who did not work themselves but lived by the
labor of others; and those who were hired to work, took
their wages, but did not fulfill the duties which they had
taken upon themselves. And also are stopped here those who
do not care to praise God and are too lazy to go to church
on holidays and Sundays, either in the morning or to the
Divine Liturgy, or to other church services. And here too
people are accused of despondency and general carelessness
about things that have to do with the salvation of their
souls; and this happens to both laymen and those who are
ordained. Many are thence led into the abyss. I too was
accused there of much and could not have freed myself if the
holy angels had not balanced my deficiencies by the gifts of
the holy man Basil.
Sixth Torment. "Thence we came to the torment of stealing,
and although we were briefly stopped there, we went on after
we had given a small ransom only: for no stealing was found
on my record, except some very unimportant occurrences in my
childhood, and those stemmed from lack of reason.
Seventh Torment. "We passed without stopping through the
station of avarice and love of money. By God's grace I never
loved riches. I was content with what God gave me and never
was avaricious; on the contrary, I diligently gave to the
needy that which I had.
Eighth Torment. "When we rose still higher, we came to the
station of usury, where those are accused who lend money for
illegal interest; and here too are stopped those who gain
riches by exploiting their neighbors; and those who take
bribes, or by some other way stealing indirectly, acquire
what really belongs to others. The tormentors, when they did
not find me guilty of such sins, gnashed their teeth with
annoyance, but we went on, praising God in the meanwhile.
Ninth Torment. "Now there lay before us the torment of
injustice. Here are punished the unjust judges who acquit
the guilty and condemn the innocent, all for the sake of
gain; and also those who do not give the appointed wages to
those whom they have hired, and the merchants who use false
weights and measures; and all the others who are in some way
or other unjust. We, however, by God's grace, passed this
station without incurring any grief after we had given only
a little bit for my sins in this regard.
Tenth Torment. "As for the torment of envy, we passed it
without giving anything at all in payment, for I never had
been envious. Here also people have to face the accusations
of lack of love, hatred toward their brethren,
unfriendliness, and other manifestations of hatred. Through
the mercy of Christ our God, I was found innocent of all
these sins; and although I saw the savagery of the demons, I
no longer was afraid of them. Joyfully we went on.
Eleventh Torment. "We passed then the station of pride,
where arrogant spirits make accusations of vanity, absolute
reliance on oneself rather than on God, disdain of others,
and bragging; and here too the souls are tormented for their
failure to give proper honor to their parents, their
government, or their other superiors appointed by God, and
for failure to obey them. Here we put down very little for
my sins, and I was free.
Twelfth Torment. "As we continued rising toward heaven, we
encountered the torment of anger and ruthlessness. Happy is
the man who never in his life felt anger. The eldest of the
evil spirits was sitting here on a throne, and he was full
of anger, ruthlessness, and pride. Ruthlessly and angrily he
ordered his servants to torment and accuse me. They licked
their chaps like dogs and began to point out not only all
those occasions when I actually said something angry or
unfeeling to anyone, or harmed anyone by my words, but even
those instances when I merely looked angrily at my children
or punished them severely. All these cases they represented
vividly and even indicated the time when everything
happened, the persons on whom I poured out my anger, the
very words which I then used, and in whose presence I used
them. The angels replied to all this by offering part of the
treasure, and we went on.
Thirteenth Torment. "After this the torment of bearing
grudges lay before us. Here merciless accusations await
those who nurture in their hearts evil thoughts against
their neighbors and return evil for evil. God's mercy saved
me here too, for I did not tend to have such wicked designs
and did not use to keep in mind offences of others toward
me; on the contrary, whenever I could I displayed love and
meekness toward those who offended me, and thus overcame
their evil by my goodness. Here we paid nothing. Joyful in
the Lord, we went on.
"Here I dared to ask my angel leaders: 'Tell me how can
these terrible rulers of the air know in such detail all the
evil deeds of men, and not only the open ones but even those
that are secret?' The angels replied: 'Every Christian, as
soon as he is baptized, receives from God an appointed
guardian angel who guards him invisibly and inspires him
night and day to every kind of good deed; he also records
all his good deeds, for which that man later can hope to
receive from the Lord grace and eternal recompense in the
Heavenly Kingdom. The prince of darkness, who desires to
draw into his own destruction the whole race of men as well,
also appoints one of his evil spirits to walk in the man's
steps and record all his evil deeds. It is his duty to
inspire man to such deeds by any vile trickery in his power;
and when he succeeds in his designs, he records all the
wickedness of which the man has made himself guilty. Such an
evil spirit spreads the report of every man's sins to all
the stations of torment, and this is how the sins become
known to the princes of the air. When the soul parts from
its body and desires to go to its Creator in heaven, the
evil spirits prevent the soul and show to it its sins. If
the soul has done more good deeds than evil, they cannot
keep it; but if the sins outweigh the good deeds, they keep
the soul for some time, shut it up in the prison where it
cannot know God, and torment it as much as God's power
allows them, until that soul, by means of prayers of the
Church and good deeds done for its sake by those who are
still on earth, should be granted forgiveness.
"Those who believe in the Holy Trinity and take as
frequently as possible the Holy Communion of the Holy
Mysteries of Christ our Saviour's Body and Blood—such people
can rise to heaven directly, with no hindrances, and the
holy angels defend them, and the holy saints of God pray for
their salvation, since they have lived righteously. No one,
however, takes care of the wicked and depraved heretics, who
do nothing useful during their lives, and live in disbelief
and heresy. The angels can say nothing in their defence.
"When a soul proves to be so sinful and impure before God
that it has no hope of salvation, the evil spirits
immediately bring it down into the abyss, where their own
place of eternal torment is also. There the lost souls are
kept until the time of the Lord's Second Coming. Then they
will unite with their bodies and will incur torment in the
fiery hell together with the devils. 'Note also,' said the
angels, 'that this is the way by which only those who are
enlightened by the faith and by holy baptism can rise and be
tested in the stations of torment. The unbelievers do not
come here. Their souls belong to hell even before they part
from their bodies. When they die the devils take their souls
with no need to test them. Such souls are their proper prey,
and they take them down to the abyss.'
Fourteenth Torment. "During our conversation we reached the
torment of murder, where are accused not only men such as
robbers, but even those who have in some way wounded another
man, or given him a blow, or pushed him angrily, or shoved
him. We gave a little and went on.
Fifteenth Torment. "We passed the torment of magic,
sorcery, poisoning, and incantations. The spirits of this
station resemble serpents, snakes, and toads. They are
frightening and repulsive. By the grace of God they found
nothing of the kind in me, and we went on, accompanied by
the shouts of the demons: 'Soon you will come to the torment
of fornication; let us see how you will free yourself from
it!'
"As we were rising, I dared to question the holy angels
once more: 'Do all Christians pass these torments? Is there
no possibility to pass by the torments and not be tested in
any of the stations?' The angels replied: 'There is no other
way for the souls that rise toward heaven. Every one goes
this way, but not everyone is tormented like you; only
sinners like you incur the torments, for they have not
confessed their sins fully, and moved by a false sense of
shame, have kept their really shameful deeds secret from
their spiritual fathers. When a man wholeheartedly confesses
his evil deeds and repents and regrets them, his sins are
invisibly wiped out by God's mercy. When a repentant soul
comes here, the tormentors of the air open their books but
find nothing written there; the soul, however, joyfully
ascends to the throne of God.
"'The evil spirits open their records but find nothing
written there, for the Holy Spirit has made invisible all
the writing. The spirits see this and know that what they
have recorded has all been obliterated because of the soul's
confession, and they are very much saddened by this. If the
man is still alive when his confession has wiped out his
sins, the spirits once again try to have an occasion to
record some new sins of his.
"'Indeed, there is a great source of salvation for man in
his confession! Confession saves him from many misfortunes
and much unhappiness and gives him the opportunity to pass
all the torments with no hindrance and to approach God. Some
people do not confess their sins because they hope to have
time for salvation and for a remittance of their sins;
others are simply ashamed of telling their spiritual father
about their sins. They will, however, be severely tested
when they pass the stations of torment. There are still
other people, who are ashamed of telling everything to one
spiritual father. Therefore they choose several and reveal
some of their sins to one and others to another, and so on;
they will be punished for this kind of confession and will
suffer a great deal as they pass from one torment into
another.
"'If you too had made a complete confession of your sins
and had been granted remission of them, and had then done
all you could to make up for them by good deeds—if you had
done all this, you would not have been subjected to such
terrible torments in the stations. You were, however,
greatly helped by the fact that you have long ago ceased to
commit deadly sins and have spent the rest of your life in
virtue; and especially have you been helped by the prayers
of God's holy man Basil, whom you have served much and
diligently.'
Sixteenth Torment. "During our conversation we approached
the torment of fornication, where souls are accused not of
actual fornication only but also of amorous daydreaming, of
finding such thoughts sweet, of impure glances, lustful
touches and passionate strokings. The prince of this torment
was clothed in a dirty and stenching garment befouled by a
bloody foam, and there was a multitude of demons standing
around him. When they saw me they marveled that I had
already 'Passed so many torments. They brought out the
records of all my deeds of fornication and accused me by
pointing out the persons, the places, and the times: with
whom, when, and where I sinned in my youth. I kept silent
and was trembling with shame and fear. The holy angels,
however, said to the devils: 'Long ago has she left her
deeds of fornication and has spent the remainder of her life
in purity, abstinence, and fasting.' But the demons replied:
'We too know that she has long ago ceased sinning, but she
has not sincerely confessed to her spiritual father and has
not received from him proper directions for the satisfaction
which she should do for her sins. Therefore she is ours!
Either leave her to us or ransom her with good deeds.' The
angels put down many of my good deeds but even more did they
take from the gift given us by the holy man Basil; barely
did I save myself from great grief.
Seventeenth Torment. "We reached the torment of adultery,
where are accused of their sins those who are married but do
not observe marital fidelity toward each other and do not
keep their marriage bed undefiled; and here too rapes are
punished. Besides, here are strictly punished those who have
devoted themselves to God and promised to live for Christ
alone, but have fallen and failed to keep their purity. I
too had a great debt here; the evil spirits already had
accused me and were about to tear me from the arms of the
angels, but the angels began to argue with them and show
them all my later labors and good deeds. After some time
they rescued me, but with difficulty, and not so much by my
good deeds, all of which, down to the last, they deposited
here—but rather by the treasure of my father Basil, from
which they also took very much to put on the scale to
balance my iniquities. Then they took me and we went on.
Eighteenth Torment. "We approached the station of the
Sodomic sins; here souls are Accused of all unnatural sins,
incests, and others revolting deeds performed in secret,
shameful and frightening even to think about. The prince of
this torment was more disgusting than any other devil; he
was befouled by pus and full of stench. His servants were
similar to him. The stench that came from them was not to be
endured, their ugliness was unimaginable, their cruelty and
ruthlessness not to be expressed. They surrounded us but by
the grace of God found nothing in me and ran away from us in
their shame. We, however, went on.
"The holy angels said to me: 'You have seen, Theodora, the
frightening and disgusting torments of fornication! Know
then that few are the souls that pass them without stopping
and paying their ransom; for the whole world lies immersed
in the evils of seductive foulness, and all mankind is
sensuous. Few guard against the impurities of fornication
and deaden the desire of their own flesh. And this is the
reason why few pass here freely; many come as far as this
place but perish here. The rulers of the torments of
fornication boast that they more than any of the others fill
the fiery abyss of hell with the souls of men. But you,
Theodora, must thank God that you have already passed the
torments of fornication by the prayers of the holy man
Basil, your father. Now you will no longer fear.'
Nineteenth Torment. "Thereafter we came to the torment of
heresies, where are punished those reasonings about faith
which are not right, and also turning away from the Orthodox
confession of faith, and lack of faith, doubts about it,
denial of holy things or a negative attitude toward them,
and other sins of the kind. I passed this torment without
being tested; we were no longer far from the gates of
Heaven.
Twentieth Torment. "But here we were met by the evil
spirits of the last torment, the station that tests lack of
compassion and cruelty of heart. Cruel are the tormentors of
this place, and their prince is terrible, and dried-up and
depressed is his appearance. Here the souls of the
unmerciful are tormented without mercy. Even if a man
performs the most outstanding deeds, mortifies himself by
fasting, prays ceaselessly, and guards and keeps the purity
of his body, but is merciless from this station he is cast
down into the abyss of hell and will receive no mercy in all
eternity. We, however, by the grace of Christ, passed this
place without trouble, for we were helped by the prayers of
the holy man Basil.
"Now we approached the gates of Heaven. We entered
joyfully, for we had passed unharmed through the bitter
tests of the torments. The gates resembled crystal, and the
buildings that stood there glistened like stars. The youths
who stood there were wearing golden garments. They joyfully
received us, for they saw that a soul had escaped from the
bitter tests of the torments of the air.
"As we were walking in heaven, joyful and glad to be saved,
the water that was above the earth parted, and, then it
closed again behind us. We came to a very awesome place
where there were very beautiful youths in fiery garments.
They saw the angels carrying me and met us with joy at the
salvation of my soul for the kingdom of God. They went
together with us and sang the Divine Song.
"As we continued walking, a cloud descended on us, and then
another cloud; and when we had gone somewhat farther, we saw
an inexplicable height on which was the throne of God; it
was very white and enlightened all who stood before it.
Around it stood very beautiful youths clothed in red and
shining. Why should I, my child Gregory, tell you about it?
There are things that cannot be either understood or
explained. Reason is clouded by incapacity to understand
fully, and memory vanishes there; I forgot where I was.
"The holy angels who had brought me there led me to the
throne of God, and here I bowed before the Unseen God; and
then I heard a voice which said: 'Go with her and show her
all the souls of the blessed and of the sinners, all the
dwellings of the saints that are in Paradise, and the
dwellings in the nether regions of hell; then grant her rest
wherever my follower Basil will indicate.'
"We went on a road unknown to me and came to the dwellings
of the saints. What shall I say about them? I am in
confusion. There are various chambers arranged artfully and
beautifully. Of course they are created by God's hand and
are what the Scripture calls 'the cool place, the fruitful
place, the place of rest.'
"When I saw all this I marveled and was very joyous and
happily looked at everything. A holy angel who was showing
these things to me explained: 'This is the abode of the
Apostles; that one—of the prophets and other martyrs; those
others of the holy bishops, holy monks, and the holy
righteous.' All these were in their breadth and length like
a king's city.
"When we entered and found ourselves inside these lovely
dwellings, the saints met us and kissed us in spirit and
rejoiced in my salvation. Then they took me to the abode of
the patriarch Abraham and showed me everything that was
there. Everything was full of glory and of spiritual joy; of
fragrant flowers, myrrh, and sweet odors.
"There were various chambers, which are made and upheld by
God's Spirit alone. We saw there a multitude of infants who
were happy and rejoicing. I asked my angel leaders: 'Who are
these infants gathered here, bathed in light, rejoicing
around this holy old man?' The angels replied that this was
the patriarch Abraham, and that the multitude was composed
of Christian infants.
"Then we went to see the surroundings of Paradise; but
their beauty simply cannot be described. If I should begin
to tell all that I saw and heard there, I should be filled
with fear and trembling.
"Then I was led into the nether reaches of hell, where the
Lord has bound and imprisoned Satan. There I saw frightening
torments. Thence they led me westward, and there too I saw
similar horrible torments, ready for sinners. As the angels
showed all this to me, they said: 'Do you see from what
misfortunes you have been saved by the prayers of the holy
man?'
"The sinners in their horrible torments were shrieking and
begging for mercy. I saw torments of such a kind that it is
excruciating even to tell about them.
"When we had passed and examined all this, one of the
angels who, accompanied me said: 'You know, Theodora, that
in the world there is the custom to remember the dead on the
fortieth day after their death; today the holy man Basil
remembers you on earth in his prayers.'
"Yes, my spiritual child Gregory, forty days have now
passed since the time when my soul parted from my body, and
I am in the place which is ready also for our holy father
Basil. You are still in the world, and so is holy Basil, but
he shows the way of truth to all who come to him, and by
compelling them to repent he makes many turn to the Lord.
"Come with me. We shall enter my inner chamber and you will
look at it. Not long before you came, the holy man Basil was
also here."
I went after her and we entered together. As we were
walking along I saw that her garments were as white as snow.
We entered a palace decorated with gold. In its midst there
were various trees that bore splendid fruit. When I looked
east I saw luxurious halls, light and high. There was a
large table on which stood golden vessels; they looked very
expensive and were wondrous to look at. In the vessels were
vegetables of all sorts, and fragrance issued from them.
The holy man Basil was there, sitting on a marvelous
throne. Near the table there stood people, but they were
unlike those who live on earth and have bodies: they were
surrounded as if by the rays of the sun, but they still
looked human.
As they ate the food that was on the table, the amount of
the food became replenished of itself. Beautiful youths were
serving them. When any of those who were at the table wished
to drink, he poured a liquid into his mouth and experienced
a spiritual sweetness. They spent long hours at this table.
The youths who were serving them were girded with golden
belts, and on their heads were crowns made from a precious
stone.
Theodora approached the holy man and begged him for me. The
holy man looked at me and joyfully called me to himself. I
approached and bowed before him to the ground, as was our
custom. He quietly told me: "God will be merciful to you and
forgive you, my child! He is the All-merciful; He will
reward you with all the heavenly goods." He lifted me from
the ground and continued: "Here is Theodora. You very much
wished to see her and asked me for this so intently: now you
do see her, and you see where she is and of what destiny her
soul has been found worthy in this our life beyond death.
Look at her well."
Theodora looked at me and said: "My brother Gregory!
Because you thought about me humbly, the merciful Lord has
fulfilled your wish through the prayer of our father, the
holy man Basil."
The holy man turned to Theodora and said: "Go with him and
show him my garden. Let him see its beauty." She took me by
my right hand and brought me to a wall in which there was a
golden gate. After she had opened the gate, she led me
inside the garden. There I saw trees of a marvelous beauty.
Their leaves were golden, they were full of flowers and
emitted an unusually pleasant fragrance.
There was a countless number of such lovely trees. Their
branches were bowed to the ground because of the weight of
the fruit. All this astonished me. Theodora turned toward me
and asked: "Why do you wonder? How much would you marvel if
you saw the garden called Paradise, which the Lord Himself
planted in the East!? You would be astonished at its
greatness and beauty. As compared to it, this garden is
nothing."
I begged Theodora to tell me who had planted this garden,
for I had never seen anything like it. She replied that it
was obvious that I never had, for I was still living on
earth; here, however, everything was other than earthly, and
the life led here was other than earthly.
"God grants such dwellings in the life beyond death, but
only to those who have led a life full of labors and sweat,
such as the life of our holy father Basil has been from his
youth to his deep old age. Such dwellings are granted to
those who pray zealously and deny their desires, as he has
done when he slept on bare ground, endured intense heat and
frost, ate on occasion nothing except grass. This is the
kind of life which he has led before he came to
Constantinople, but this life was a source of salvation to
himself, and through him, to many others. This kind of life,
and prayers of holy men like Basil, enable the departed to
enter the abodes of the blessed.
"He who during his earthly life endures many griefs and
misfortunes; he who strictly keeps the Lord's commandments
and does not swerve from them—he receives his reward and his
comfort in the life beyond death. The holy author of the
Psalms, David, said about the difficult life on earth that
pleases God: 'Eat of the fruit of your labors'."
When Theodora told me that life in heaven is different from
life on earth, I could not help touching myself, for I
seemed eager to know if I was still in the flesh; as of
course I was. My feelings and thoughts were pure, and my
spirit rejoiced in all that I had seen. I wished to return
to the palace by the same gate through which I had entered.
When, however, I had returned to the palace, I no longer
found anyone at the table.
I bowed to Theodora and returned home; and at that very
moment I awoke and thought to myself: where have I been and
what was all that which I have seen and heard?
I rose from my bed and went to the holy Basil in order to
learn from him whether my vision was from God or from the
devils. When I came to him, I, according to our custom,
bowed to the ground. He blessed me, bade me to sit near him
and asked me: "Do you know, my child, where you were this
night?"
I pretended to know nothing and replied: "My father, I have
been nowhere; I was sleeping on my bed." The holy man said:
"This is true. Your body actually was asleep on your bed,
but your spirit was elsewhere, and you still know everything
that was revealed to you this night.
"You have seen Theodora. When you approached the gates of
the heavenly kingdom, she met you joyfully, led you inside
the house, showed you everything, told you about her death
and about all the torments that she had passed.
"Was it not at my bidding that you went into the court
where you saw a marvelous table and its wondrous
arrangement? Did you not see the vegetables placed there,
and did you not recognize their sweetness and see the
flowers, and what the feasters drank, and what youths were
serving them?
"Did you not stand still and look at the beauty of those
halls? When I came, did I not tell you to look at Theodora,
since you had so much wished to see her and learn from her
how she had been rewarded for her saintly life?
"Did she then not lead you at my bidding within the sacred
enclosure? Did you not see all this in your vision this
night?
"How is it then that you are saying that you have seen
nothing?"
When I heard the saint saying all this, I no longer doubted
that this was no delusion, no dream, but an actual vision
sent to me by the Lord God.
I said to myself: how great must this holy man be before
God! He himself was there in both his body and his soul, and
now he knows all that I have seen and heard there! My eyes
filled with tears and I said: "It is true, my holy father;
everything was such as you have said. I thank the Lover of
Men, the Lord our God Jesus Christ, Who has granted it to me
to see all this and has put it in my thoughts to take
recourse to you, so that I can constantly be under the
protection of your prayers and can be filled with the
sweetness of my vision, in which such great marvels have
been revealed to me."
The saint said to me: "If, my child Gregory, you will
complete your earthly journey rightly and will not swerve
from the Divine commandments, the evil spirits of the
torments in the air will be unable after your death to harm
you; you have heard this from Theodora: you will pass the
stations of torment and will be blessed. Joyfully will you
be met where you have been this night and have seen
Theodora; and where 1, sinner that I am, also hope to be
admitted to the abode which you have seen; for I place my
hope upon Christ, Who has promised to give His grace to me.
"Listen, my child, to what I am saying to you, but keep the
secret of your father. I wish to die before you, and you
will follow me after a long time, when you will have
perfected yourself in good works. This has been revealed to
me by the Lord.
"Keep secret all that I have told you, while I am alive;
let no one find out anything of what you have heard.
"When I am dead, if you should wish to undertake the labor
and not to leave my humble life without remembrance,
describe it as it is customary to describe the lives of
those who have exerted themselves in virtue.
"Describe, that is, not so much my life as that divine
grace which has led and strengthened me throughout my entire
life, and give me the ability to perform not only good deeds
but even miracles.
"Represent all that you seen and heard, and let it benefit
those who will read or listen to your account. But be
careful to state, first of all, that the Lord, when He so
deigns, helps any man to do great wonders; and tell
everything about these wonders witnessed by you, so that
those who will learn about them from you may praise God, Who
is generous with what is good.
"Beware of the traps of the evil one at all times of day
and night until the Lord should call you." All this and many
other things did the holy man tell me. Then he prayed and
dismissed me. (Lives of the Saints for March
26th).
